What To Do When Meeting Your Tinder Match For The First Time
So you sent a smooth opener, the conversation flows like a river and the time feels right as ever, so you cross your fingers and ask your match out, and voilà, she says yes!
Then the sweet taste of victory is abolished by a sinking feeling in your stomach because now you have to get through the awkwardness of meeting a girl from Tinder for the first time.
Meeting a girl from Tinder for the first time is different for everyone. Some of you may feel some butterflies right before meeting or you may lose sleep in the preceding days. No matter who you are, please remember that its completely normal to feel nervous! It means you care.
Related: What Are You Looking For On Tinder? How To Answer This Tricky Question
With that being said, us guys definitely dont want to show our match that we are feeling panicky, so lets take a look at a series of different tips to ensure you are making a great first impression the first time meeting a girl from Tinder.
Before we get into it, if you are wondering where you should take your Tinder date, check out 7 First Tinder Date Ideas.
Before Meeting A Girl From Tinder For The First Time
Search For Conversation Ammo
The best way to prepare for your Tinder date is to read back over all messages between you and your match. Read them twice, three times, 10 if you need.
The more, the merrier. This will allow you to collect really important ammo, or conversation starters for when your date arrives so that you can be beaming with confidence and have material to talk about throughout the date.
Lets have a look at how exactly to do this.
Scour through the messages in search of topics that are interesting or funny. Funny components of the conversation are fantastic to use for your introduction.
Your match and you might have been joking around about something in particular, or been talking about a specific topic.
If you bring something like this up within the first few minutes of meeting face to face, her nerves have a way better chance of subsiding.
This is because it shows you have been listening, but more importantly, she doesnt actually know this guy in front of her yet, she knows the guy she was messaging on Tinder.
So when you bring out a specific example from your conversation, any tension will immediately be diffused.
When You Are Greeting A Tinder Girl For The First Time
So the time has come when you are actually going to meet your Tinder match for the first time. Some say people will formulate their first impression of you within the first 5 seconds of meeting you, others say 60 seconds.
Regardless, this means that these first few moments of actually meeting a Tinder girl for the first time are very important. Lets take a look at a few ways you can make a great first impression with your Tinder date, no matter where you are meeting.
We want to give off a friendly, harmless and confident vibe, especially within that first couple of minutes of meetingher. Plus, smiling is contagious.
Helping your match achieve a genuine smile within the first minute of meeting them can help diffuse the tension greatly. It has also been proven that smiling, forced or not, can lift your mood and lower stress, something that will definitely get the first date started on the right note.
Whats even better than just the smile, is also locking her gaze. This little mannerism screams I find you attractive and can help create that warm fuzzy feeling from the get-go. Dont look away when she locks eyes with you either, hold it and keep smiling.
You dont want to go overboard with the eye contact so you give off a crazy vibe though, the sweet spot is around 7 to 10 seconds at a time. It gives off the vibe that you are exceptionally confident in a completely non-arrogant way, helping your date to feel at ease as well.
Say Her Name
Have you ever been in a conversation then all of a sudden hear someone close by mention your name, so you put your current conversation to a halt just to hear what that other person is saying?
This is because your ears are conditioned to hear your name and be drawn to it. Its your tag that has been with you since birth. Another thing you are conditioned to feel when you hear your name is familiarity.
Subconsciously when someone says your name, you recognize them as being someone who knows you. So, when you greet a Tinder girl for the first time in person, its so important to say her name.
This will put her in a relaxed state and feel like you arent a complete stranger.
Doing all three of the above when you meet someone from Tinder for the first time is the best way to make a great first impression. Especially if you do only have 5 seconds to do so.
Whilst On Your First Tinder Date
Chivalry is still going strong! But it has changedIm not talking about pulling out her seat for her and acting like we are living in the 1920s.
But whilst treating her as an equal, showing a little bit of chivalry definitely cannot hurt.
For example, letting your date enter or exit first, holding the door open for her, and generally just making a little bit of effort is perfect.
Remember though, being a nice guy doesnt miraculously mean you get anything in return, or deserve anything for that matter.
Dont do it in a way to expect anything in return, simply being a kind and well-mannered guy will definitely impress.
Alcohol can be good for your first date, but it can also be terrible. If you have some nerves, taking the edge off with a drink or two can definitely help you get over that bundle of nerves in your stomach.
Especially if the two of you are having drinks together, and therefore going at the same pace.
On the flip side, dont drink too much. You probably know why. First dates are all about first impressions so dont overdo it.
I am not condoning drinking alcohol if its not something you generally do, but if you do, one or two can help get rid of any awkward tension for the two of you.
After Meeting Your Tinder Date For The First Time
Paying The Bill
Im definitely not going to tell you to pay for your date if you guys decide to go out for dinner and/or drinks. Times have changed, and it is no longer completely expected that the guy.
With that being said, I personally do pay on the first date. If you decide to split the bill, thats fine, but if you seem like you care too much about being reimbursed accurately, you run the risk of her thinking you are a cheapskate.
So If you are out to dinner and do decide to pay, heres a nice little tip for you. Go to the bathroom after you have ordered everything you are going to for the night and on your way back, ask to pay.
She might think youve taken a little longer in the bathroom, but it looks pretty damn smooth when you get up at the end and admit youve already paid.
I generally like to just casually walk off until she says, but we have to pay! and then tell her I have already.
Going Back To Yours (Or Hers)
Dont assume a thing. Just because you followed every bit of advice and paid for an awesome dinner for the two of you it does not mean you are going to get laid.
There is really no one-size-fits-all advice for this topic, it really depends on your match, and you.
She might want to go to yours for a nightcap, she may want to head home. Does that mean things went bad if she doesnt want to sleep with you? No way! She might really like you but still not want to go home for multiple reasons.
Trust me, a first date without anything physical doesnt mean that there wont be a second date. Ive personally seen great relationships initiated after a first date where there wasnt even a kiss!
It really depends on the vibe youre feeling at the end of the date. Also remember, asking your date if she would like to come back to your place for a drink or to watch a movie doesnt have to sound sleazy.
Do not be afraid of rejection at this point if you do want to ask.
If you ask in a casual and confident way but she doesnt want to, she will not think youre a sleazebag after some action, you are just someone confident enough to ask.
If she declines your offer, dont show disappointment or try making excuses for why you asked.
Just smile and tell her you understand, and that you had fun tonight, and that youll catch up again/talk soon.
There you have it folks, some simple, straightforward, and hopefully helpful tips for meeting a Tinder match for the first time.
My last little tip is to try not to overthink anything Ive just explained. Having fun and enjoying your time is the most important thing here. Good luck!
If you need the matches first to even start considering getting a date, make sure you grab a free copy of my ebook Tinder Hacked.